30 Day Makeup Challenge!

So, today I had to go to the MAC store to buy some more black gel eyeliner, because my current jar has dried out. As I was walking back to the car, I was thinking about how frustrating it was that I was going to have to throw out about 2/3 of the jar, and how that's not the first product I've had that problem with, and that maybe I should do my makeup more often so I can use my products before they expire.

The thing is, although I love makeup and I love looking at makeup and buying makeup, I don't usually do my makeup unless I'm performing or testing a product for this blog. As such, when it is time to put the pretty on, I tend to fall back on the same rotation of products and the same basic look. After all, I spend most of my time either at home or sweating it up in the dance studio, so there's not a lot of call for makeup, right?

Well, for the next 30 days I'm going to break that trend. Even if my plan for the day is to sit around in my PJs writing blog posts and doing laundry all day, I'll do it with style. 30 days of makeup! 30 days of trying new products (and old ones that are just hanging out in my train case) and new looks. 30 days of fabulosity!

Every day I'll post a picture on my Sophia Ravenna FB page showing my look and the products I used. If you're curious about any of the products, just ask and I'll include them in a future Beauty Blogging for Bellydancers post.

100 Days Challenge 2013

I grabbed Gina's graphic for this challenge so you would know to go to raksgina.com and get in on it!

Today marks the start of the last 100 days of 2013. Wow! How is the year already almost over? It's flown by. Anyway, for the second year in a row, Gina is hosting a 100 Day Challenge to end the year on a powerful note, and I'm once again participating.

In case you didn't go read Gina's post, I'll do a quick summation: The 100 day challenge is where you set a certain number of goals (Gina recommends 10) that you want to hit by the end of the year. It could be developing a new habit, breaking a bad habit, or getting certain tasks done. It's kind of like New Years Resolutions, but with a time limit. It can be a little difficult, of course, because Halloween, Thanksgiving and WinterHolidayOfYourChoice all fall within that 100 days, which can throw off your mojo on whatever you're trying to do, but over all I found it pretty helpful last year.

My 10 goals for the last 100 days of 2013:

1. Write in my dance journal every day, even on days that I don't dance.

2. Build up to practicing 2 hours per day 4 days a week at a minimum, plus classes.

3. Make the sparkly bra and belt set for my next troupe costume.

4. Create and post a video tutorial for wood elf makeup.

5. Build a database for tracking my bead collection.

6. Make at least one fabulous beaded holiday gift for somebody (I know what I want to make and for who, but I can't say in case they read this post!).

7. Make plans to host/organize at least one small dance event here in Tucson (I've started getting event ideas, and I've been encouraged to make them happen).

8. Get braces on my face. It's gonna happen.

9. Stretch every day, even days that I don't dance.

10. Reorganize the costume closet. *gulp* I might not survive that last one!

Oh, zee drama

Another great pic from Pedro Romano, taken at Temple of Eden. I am being all dramatic, oooooh.

Ok, here's the thing... I'm not good at talking about feelings. Every now and then I'll sit down at this blog and write a deep post about issues in the community, or my struggles with dancer's block, but in general I approach things with a thick veneer of sarcasm, self-depreciation, and downright smart-assery. I am not good at letting my guard down and letting people in, so I am especially not good at really showing my true emotions on stage.

That said, I can really connect with a song, and I can really show my passion for dancing. People react pretty strongly to the solo that the above picture is from because I just feel that song so damn hard that it shows. It's very emotional, but it's mostly positive emotions.

So this brings us to next week's Open Stage and my special challenge for it. I have to dance out some of my feelings. I am still struggling a bit with the loss of my friend Marilee. It's weird, because I've never struggled with a loss this much, but I've also never lost someone that I talked to almost every day, and who had given me lots of little things (beads and books, mostly) that I see around my house all the time. I think this sadness is one of the issues that has really kept me from being inspired to dance lately. I was talking to Jolie about it, as part of a gripe about how little I've been dancing at home lately, and she suggested that I work on something for Open Stage that would express those feelings. The funny thing is that I almost did so for the last Open Stage, but it felt too raw.

I have a song tentatively picked out, a song that has a small connection to my friend -- it's a song I like, but also a song that was used as the theme for a TV show she told me about, one she really enjoyed and which I would watch too, when I got a chance. And it's a beautiful song, a song that feels like floating, flying out, reaching towards a goal and never quite reaching it.

But I am scared to do it. I'm really scared of stepping out onto the dance floor and baring my soul to a bar full of people, people who range from my fellow dancers to my gaming friends to random people just out for a drink. I mean, what if I start crying? I feel like crying on stage would be the most awful and awkward thing ever.

For most of my dance career, I've focused on dance as entertainment -- either as a way to entertain myself, or an audience. And over the past year I have stepped out of my comfort zone a little bit, trying moody and sad music, but not music that actually made me sad. Not music that had any real deep meaning to me. To take that leap from entertainment to performance art, to try to make people really think and feel, it's a little scary. There's more chance of failure, more vulnerability. And I just don't do vulnerable well.

We'll see how this turns out. It may be beautiful and therapeutic or I may end up crying in a bar bathroom.